It felt like there was a party in my stomach, and someone invited an asshole.
“
| — | Orion, RE: McRib |
Earths and Ladders
Matt: ummm
Matt: i think brutal retardation may be happening
Matt: theyve got a ladder resting against the air duct
Matt: no real support?
Jon: dude, we're on a giant ball of rock and magma hurtling through the galaxy not attached to anything, don't talk to me about support
Executive Lunch
Matt: want to take an executive lunch?
Jon: is that where steven segal is a chef and falls out of a plane?
Me: if it’s what jon said, then i’m in
Emergency Contacts and Cell Phone Memory
receptionist: what is your emergency contact's relationship with you?
me: she's my fiancée
receptionist: what is her phone number?
me: uhhh... i dunno
receptionist: <uncontrollable laughter>
